Phyllis Diller was inspiring for many reasons. She proved you don't have to be young and lovely to be successful or to begin a career. She paved the way for women in a man's world. She made a lot of people laugh when they had reasons to cry.
I became a fan when I was a school girl. I never got to meet her or see her perform live. But, I was blessed to connect with a mentor, Emmy Award winning writer Gene Perret, who credits Phyllis Diller with giving him a career break. So to some extent, Phyllis Diller is the Kevin Bacon of comedy writers. Her influence and talent touches all of us in some way.
I think the best way I can pay honor to this truly amazing woman is to attempt to keep her legacy alive by writing the best comedy possible and sharing it with the world. This week, I'd like to offer a Top Ten List of Moby Dick Jokes that I wrote to pay tribute to Phyllis Diller and her fictitious mother-in-law who supposedly was as large as a whale.
10. Once she stood on a street corner wearing a blue dress and race horses stopped to graze because they thought she was Kentucky.
9. On days she wears a blue dress, the Thunderbirds cancel air shows because the stunt pilots can't tell if they're flying right side up or upside down.
8. Moby Dick's cooking is so bad neighborhood dogs had the health department close down her trash cans.
7. Once she stood on a street corner wearing a blue dress and Jesus tried to walk on her.
6. When she wore a blue dress, King Kong mistook her for his jar of Noxema and tried to twist off her head.
5. Once she stood on a street corner wearing a blue dress and Chicken Little yelled, "The sky has fallen."
4. Once she stood on a street corner in a blue dress. Well part of her did. The rest of her extended into the next five blocks.
3. Moby Dick's cooking is so bad that when it's time to set the table, the dish runs away with the spoon.
2. When she wore a blue dress to the beach, instead of building a sand castle next to her, some kid developed an entire sand subdivision.
1. Once she stood on a street corner wearing a blue dress and a realtor sold the corner as ocean front property – in Arizona.
SEE ME LIVE:
FRIDAY, AUGUST 24 – 8 pm (doors open at 6 pm)
Best of L.A. Comedy Showcase
The Comedy Spot Comedy Club – AKA – Don the Beachcomber
16278 Pacific Coast Highway
Huntington Beach, CA
** Go online to order 1/2 –price tickets
** $10 at the door
** Two item minimum purchase (Seafood reported to be delicious
SATURDAY, AUGUST 25 – 2pm
Million Laughs Comedy Troupe
Private Show – Assisted Living Facility
La Habra, CA
*** NOTE: For information on booking Million Laughs Comedy Troupe for your charity or corporate event, contact www.Millionlaughs.com
SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 2 – 1:30 pm
Million Laughs Comedy Troupe
Private Show – Veterans Hospital
Long Beach, CA
*** NOTE: For information on booking Million Laughs Comedy Troupe for your charity or corporate event, contact www.Millionlaughs.com
MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 3 – 7 pm
Comics on the Spot
The Warehouse
4499 Admiralty Way
Marina del Rey, CA
** $10 – or two for one cover
** No item minimum purchase required (Seafood reported to be delicious)
